...by Emma Jade Gunn
The Metalunas' Instrumentals of Terror was recorded, if you read the small print which (of course!) Lil Em always does, in Horrific Stereo. What we get as a result is mash to bash, stomp to romp, and beats to heat ya of the most horrific kind and that's a good thing! The cover is cooler than an iceberg what with its monster ready to munch on a bikini-clad damsel who looks more like she's having a good time than in distress. And, why not? She's going to be taken out to sea with The Metalunas creature. Oh, baby, this CD is monster good. Grab a licorice and some cola and stomp like Godzilla with me.
- THE CURSE OF PIER 13
- (Mark Brody) Mark, did you write this song just to make Emma melt like a chocolate bar on the dash of a '49 Ford on a sultry summer day? This is Surf Rock, baby; this is quintessential surf rock with blazing guitars, hoots, hollers, drums crashing like the waves and .... excuse me, I need to rest after this one .... it takes my breath away.
- SCOOBY DOO
- (Curtin, Hanna, Barbara) The Scooby Doo theme done all monster instrumental with all that reverb? Bewitching! All of the way up to the ending which is waaay out.
- SURF PARTY
- (W. Dunham, B. Beverly) I like the guitar run. Mucho energy here. Did I mention I like the glissando? Fun, party, wowsers. It has a really, really great guitar run or have I said that already?
- MOJO
- (Mark Brody) Why hasn't this song been on an Austin Powers movie? I tell you, Austinmaniacs, write to Mike Meyers and tell them this is his song. I wouldn't lead you astray. I wouldn't do that. Never. Nope. Nah. Not me. This is your theme song. It's bad. It's vintage. It's perfect. Got my mojo on, baby? You?
- PLASTICS FOR 500, IGOR
- (Shadowy Men) Superlative Surfy Sensibility. And who said I can't write like the Big Boys? Hah!
- DEATH COMES AT MIDNIGHT
- (Mark Brody) Oooo! This is spooky. Caught in the vampire's lair with your neck exposed and your chest heaving in fear and your eyes glistening with little tears of fear while your legs wobble spooky. No, Mr. Vampire Sir, do not suck the blood from my ever beating heart so that I must listen as my pulse slooooowly stops. Hope! Suddenly! Then. No more. I am lost. Abandoned. Falling into the abyss. The clock ticks it's last rhythm to the beat of my dying heart. Whew! And all of that in only a couple of minutes!
- GHOSTS OF THE WILD FRONTIER
- (Mark Brody) Since country music people are always copying old rock and roll and calling it new country, they might as well also swipe Brody's Ghosts of the Wild Frontier and call it Surf Pasture or something. This is really cool. All country but still surf rock. Neat trick, guys!
- THE CAT'S PAJAMAS
- (Mark Brody) You gotta love any song that begins "Meow." What with the squeak toys and hyper backbeat on the drums, The Metalunas prove their worth as a truly outragously fun band with this tune. Hubba, hubba, Dudes! Meow.
- MUNSTER MOSH
- (Mark Brody) Eureka! Listen to that! Surf doesn't get any better than this, kids! To drool over lead, heavy drumming, ruh-ruh-rhythm to take your breath away. Go, Eddie Munster, go, hullabaloo, too. They even did a trickle of sound at the end to make me, uh, wonder.
- CRASH
- (C. Delaney) Some really great picking makes Crash stand out and whistle, "Emma, Emmmmmma, shake it, shake it, baby." If I did aerobics to this song I'd weigh ten pounds. Clean fun! Yay!
- GODZILLA STOMP
- (Mark Brody) Godzilla? Did I miss something? Isn't Godzilla a little too, well, big to stomp to this? Okay, I get it. The Big G Guy puts on clogs and snaps his fingers and slaps his knees. Okay, I get it now. Godzilla gets to do anything he pleases because he's, well, Godzilla, you know? And so get off your denim and rock, baby. This is a dance me silly song.
- GO-GO GREMLIN
- (Mark Brody) Once again Brody proves his considerable worth as both musician and composer. This be surfdom's super surfy ode to either the cars – Whoosh! Zero to fifty in forty minutes! – or the monster dudes who eat board wax and scare children on All Hallow's Eve. Neato. I'm not afraid of gremlins, but I think I'm going to take this along just in case. The end of Go-Go (kind of like an uber cool Easter Egg for those who hang in there) is delivered in a really, really scary way!
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